s beauty queen Ruffa Gutierrez-Bektas and video jock Donita Rose Cavett-Villarama settle into their married lives, they find unexpected joys in domesticity, motherhood, and their enduring friendship.

Donita says she and Ruffa are like Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton in the US reality show, A Simple Life—only “funnier.” Just a few days ago, the producers of Extra Challenge had them wading in a muddy pond looking for frogs. “Not just ordinary frogs,” says Ruffa in her valley girl accent, “you know, like toads!”

It is hard to imagine these two lovely ladies wading in dirty water. But it's true, says Donita, they were trying to catch some toads. And every time the very poised 5'9 1/2" beauty queen felt something in the water, she'd jump on the loquacious 5'5 1/2" video jock.

“She would cling to me like a monkey,” says Donita. “And she's not exactly feather-like. So her I am trying to balance in the water with a huge monkey clinging to me.” Everyone in room is laughing, including Ruffa, who is laughing even harder.

Two people couldn't be more different. Ruffa breezed into the studio in her Chanel shades and Chanel bag followed by her yaya, toting matching Louis Vuitton makeup bag and suitcase, looking undeniably like a movie star. Donita scrambled in, her nail polish still wet, her hair in disarray, with her baby and her yaya lugging a diaper bag. Donita is the easygoing girl next door, who married her long-time friend. Ruffa is the jet-setting woman of the world who married a Turkish millionaire. How could they have remained friends for the past 17 years?

“Are we different?” asks Ruffa. “Am I not the girl next door?” Donita laughs, “Ha!”

It all began in That's

Donita and Ruffa met in 1991 at That's Entertainment, the quintessential variety show that launched a thousand showbiz careers. Donita was introduced to Ruffa by Kuya Germs, the show's host and producer. “You were so shy then,” Ruffa tells Donita. “I think you were fresh from Clark . Super Americanized. And Kuya Germs goes, ‘This is our newest member, Donita Rose,'” Ruffa mimicks Kuya Germs, trying to imitate the man's voice. “I'm like, ‘Hi.' And he asked me if we should get you. And I said, ‘Get her, get her. She's very pretty.”

“So you mean I owe you my career!” Donita says to Ruffa in an incredulous voice. Ruffa then goes on about how Donita was shy and timid. They did not hit it off right away. Until, one day, Ruffa narrates, she saw Donita in Fanny Serrano's salon.

“She just came up to me. The thing about Donita is she's really friendly and a real person. So she says, ‘You know I've been hearing all these intrigas about you. I want you to know that I'm your friend.'” Donita laughs, shaking her head. “You said that!” Ruffa insists, not to be contradicted. “She was like, ‘Let's hang out. Call me any time. We can have dinner. We can have lunch.' I'm like, ‘Oh, OK.'”

“I can't believe I was so mabait,” Donita says out loud. “You know,” she tells Ruffa, “after that very difficult time I noticed that people were becoming more distant with you. I remember telling myself, I don't care whatever this girl has been through. Nobody deserves to be treated that way. Everybody makes mistakes or whatever. The things people said. I felt so sad for you.” Ruffa is looking like she's about to cry, but says, “Oh, stop that! Now, people will think I made a mistake.”

“I mean everybody makes mistakes. So whether you made a mistake or not, no one has the right to judge you. So I said I'm going to make a conscious effort to show this girl that there are people in this world who are not judgmental,” says Donita.

Many people have said many things about Ruffa that are not exactly pleasant, but she has risen about it all. The unpleasant only made her tougher, more mature. Later, Ruffa will say that she cannot live in the Philippines . “I fly in, do my thing, fly out and come back. That's it.”

When you're successful, she says, Filipinos will tend to pull you down. That's why she feels she cannot live here. It is insight from a girl who has been “pulled down” a lot. To move on, she busies herself with Fashion TV Turkey, a Parish-based channel that tackles everything about fashion. Maybe a few years from now, she says, this business will be more stable and they will be able to expand by bringing in more channels to Tukey. “They” means her and Yilmaz Bektas, her tycoon husband.

Getting real

Ruffa is the fighter, her famous mother's daughter. Donita is the sweet one, the one who will say hi to a pole.

“D's the type even if somebody steps all over her, she'll still say hi,” says Ruffa almost disapprovingly. “I'm the one who says, ‘Hinid ka na nga pinapansin.' She's going to say, that's OK. The difference between us is I'm the fighter, and she's like…,” Ruffa hesitates. “I can't say super friendly, just the ultimate nice one.”

The ultimate nice one. Where Donita will coddle her friend from a world of troubles, Ruffa will fight to the death for her best buddy. So make no mistakes, Ruffa says. When somebody steps on her toes, she will fight back.

During the shoot, Ruffa tells a story of a European woman who comes up to her and asks where she's from. When Ruffa answered that she's from the Philippines , the woman said, “Oh that's where my maid comes from. Do you know where I can get more?” Ruffa is appalled. “What does she freaking mean? Does she think I'm a freaking agency? I should have said that my nanny is from London !”

Ruffa is not bragging: her second child's yaya is indeed a nurse from England . You can't help but quietly cheer her on. Go, Ruffa!

That's just the way Ruffa is, says Donita. She's real. What you see is what you get. But there's more underneath. Donita's eyes narrow mischievously. “You know, because she's a beauty queen, she's very posed and decked out,” Donita says impishly implying that her friend doesn't seem to have an uncomfortable moment.

Very much a princess

Few people would forget Ruffa in her breakthrough movie, Ang Pinakamagandang Hayop Sa Balat Ng Lupa. In the Gloria Diaz remake, Ruffa plays a barrio lass. When she came onscreen, people couldn't quite believe this sweet girl was the daughter or the fiery Annabelle Rama.

The character Ruffa played is very different from the Ruffa we see now, who emits a worldly aura. She just signed on as plastic surgeon Dr. Manny Calayan's endorser. “I'm very excited about that. Be sure to put that in,” Ruffa will say later, “I'm excited about how he'll enhance my natural beauty.” Nothing surgical, she says. “I still use my creams and all. But I'm not getting any younger. I mean I already had two kids back to back, which means I've been pregnant 18 months out of 24.”

Yet, Ruffa doesn't look at all like she was ever pregnant. No wrinkle mars her face and she doesn't look a day over 18. But underneath her sophisticated worldliness is a mellowness, which she confirms she feels. “I no longer surround myself with a hundred friends I can't call when I have a problem. I don't go out so much anymore. I can be left alone with my husband for five days and be perfectly happy. All my friends now are moms like myself.”

Her family is her priority now. She and Yilmaz have two daughters, Lorin and Venice. She wants her kids to graduate from Ivy League schools and have professions. Lorin is the one who takes after Ruffa, playing with her mom's makeup since she was 10 months. Venice , Ruffa says, already looks like the serious one. “She's going to be the next Condeleeza Rice.”

Ruffa has big dreams for her daughters, just like the big dreams she had for herself when she donned a cape and pretended to be Miss Universe when she was 10. And she is serious when she says that for her daughters to fulfill those dreams, they cannot got out on dates and they have to be virgins when they get married.

“If ever, the boy can just talk to me and Yilmaz first to ask permission to see our daughters, then if he has that, then he can visit the house and bring fruits. No dates.” Ruffa is adamant and serious when she says this, but Donita only laughs. “Iba talaga if you've been there and done that.” Ruffa is sheepish and is quiet for a moment. Her friend gets her every time but she doesn't seem to mind.

Happy to be kengkoy

Unlike Ruffa, Donita is still trying to get rid of her pregnancy fat. “I enjoyed my pregnancy so much I gained 62 pounds!” Donita exclaims. Close friend Charlene Gonzalez told her to enjoy her pregnancy. Apparently, that got stuck in her head and Donita vowed to be a happy pregnant woman, which she was. Now, Donita's on the South Beach diet, trying to lose a good 15 pounds.

Her son, JP for John Paul (she named her son after her brothers), is 14 months old and is quite the happy baby. His squeals of joyous laughter can be heard in the background as he toddles around the studio. Donita brings her baby with her everywhere she goes. She, her husband, and apparently her son are all kengkoy, she says. And we see it. It is Donita who is hamming it up for the camera, making funny faces and striking funny poses. Ruffa is uncharacteristically sweet, posing expertly, Donita jokes and tells anecdotes about Ruffa.

To say that Donita is happy is an understatement. Between work for Thumbs Up, a nonprofit organization, her TV stuff, and her family life with husband Eric and JP, life could not be better. Donita, who is the second Filipino to grace a Time cover (the first one being Cory Aquino), Asia 's favorite MTV VJ, is deliriously happy.

Mo Twister, one of her good friends, says he always knew Donita would be the best mom in the world because she always prioritized her family. Without conceit, Donita says she believes this to be true.

“I am so proud to be a mother. I have this habit whenever we get out of the vehicle and we have to go into the public eye, I want to carry JP and be seen carrying him in public.” She just did a Dimetapp commercial with JP and is very happy about it. “I love the fact that all the attention went from me to my baby. He's the celebrity now and I love it.”

Known for her strong religious convictions, it is no surprise that Donita attributes her happiness to God. “The secret to happiness and success in any area of your life, your spiritual life, your marriage, on being a mother, a friend, is asking yourself if what you do is pleasing to God,” she says. “I know it sounds preachy but it's really how I live my life. I know, and I don't have a tinge of doubt in my mind, that I will never go hungry. I will never end up taking Prozac. I will be forever with my husband. We will never get a divorce. I know that as long as I continue to seek God wholeheartedly, he will continue to give me the desires of my heart. It's very simple.”

It's really quite simple

And it is that. In the fleeting world of show business, these two realize that life can be very simple: When you've found a friend, you hold on to that person forever. It doesn't matter that they're countries apart. They keep in touch. They make each other the godmothers of their kids, visit each other, call each other when they're down, tease each other, laugh. They do things good friends do.

“Hopefully, we will be friends until we're grandmothers,” Ruffa says. “I'm sure our kids will be playing with each other.” Donita perks up at that.

“Do you know that she promised her daughter, Venice , to my son? Then we were out and I heard her promising Venice to someone else! I say, wait a minute. Didn't you promise Venice to JP?” Ruffa laughs. “If Yilmaz reads this, he'll be like, ‘Oh no, Venice is not going to be with anybody. She's going to be with me for the rest of her life.”

Whether JP and Venice end up together or not, it is very clear that these two women will be together forever, good friends for the rest of their lives.

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