hether bitching about her baubles or speculating on her social appearances, people can't stop talking about one of Manila's most controversial and enigmatic actress

Whether she's making a grand entrance at an awards night, goddess-like in knockout Inno or Pepito, or missing from social affair to which all of Manila's darling set has been invited, Gretchen Barretto never fails to make her presences felt.

Settling down to catch her breath after climbing three flights of stairs to Raymund Isaac's new studio in Makati, the photographer has just asked his subject of the day is she attended the big Louis Vuitton to-do a few days before. Champagne-flowed endlessly, she was told, and so many people came, most of them stayed to the wee hours. Was she there? Was she invited? "No," she answers with a sly smiles, suggesting that she was, of course, on the guest lists. But she didn't go." Ang pumupunta lang sa mga ganyan, yung hindi bumibili," she laughs.

As veteran party observers know by heart, the most important, most "present" person in a party is sometimes the one who didn't show up. Gretchen, through no maneuvering of her part, has essayed this enviable role for nearly a decade now, dropping one invited after another. After deciding to settle down with partner Tonyboy Cojuangco nine years ago, her public appearances have been reduced to limited engagements on television, the occasional magazine cover and doing the occasional song number at an awards nights. She is more talked about and heard about than seen-and she'd rather have it that way, preferring to keep her name out there by keeping the mystery, while keeping her man, daughter (Dominique, 8) and home.

Besides, the party scene has never been her cup of tea. "I've been working since the age of 12, that's the kinds of life I know," she tells us during a break in the photo shoot. That's why when the Philippine Daily Inquirer referred to her as a "trying-hard socialite," she had to make a statement in The Buzz-in tears. "I was really hurt by that statement," she tells Metro. "You can't call me a socialite dahil never ko pinagsiksikan ang sarili ko in that scene. But yes, you can call me "trying-hard,' because that I know. You can call me trying-hard singer, a trying-hard actress, because for a long time I had to try hard, and it was the thing to do if you had to pay the bill."

That episode of the Sunday show became the talk of the town, not just because of La Greta's tears, but also because Gretchen, who was pinch-hitting for the recently-resigned Kris Aquino, wore a sweeping black ballskirt and her usual eye-catching bling-blings. That jewelry she wore the Sunday before, went a text question from a viewer, how much was it worth? Where did she get them?

"I'm so tired of that," she tells her audience, composed of this magazine's editors, Isaac and favorite makeup artist Patrick Rosas, after being shown the jewelry she was to wear for that morning's shoot. The statement was not about the Bulgari (she liked one of the two set, and even suggested what would look better for the cover). It was a reaction to Isaac's question: "Why does everyone presume that everytime you come out wearing jewelry, it's Bulgari?"

And why do people presume that all Gretchen does is shop, we ventured later on. "So what if I shop a lot? We didn't steal that money from the taxpayers."

While kibitzers only choose to focus on the luxury she enjoys, most of Gretchen's time is actually spent being a wife and mother. She personally fetches Dominique from school everyday ("No fail"), and even if there's the occasional shoot or taping, she is always home before Tonyboy arrives from work.

Of course, she doesn't do the house chores ("What do you mean by chores?"). "But I do my obligations as a housewife. I plan what the food would be, I tell the help what to buy, what to fix," she told Metro last year. That she met Tonyboy when he was already used to being single made it easier for Gretchen. "He's not dependent on anyone when it comes to stuff like fixing his clothes. In fact, in the beginning, when we started to travel, he had to help me pack my things because I didn't know how."

But now that Tonyboy has officially acquired ABC 5, Gretchen's role as his partner will have an added new dimension. And her critics might finally have to change their perception of Gretchen as "the spoiled trophy wife." While she declines to talk about any of the station's plans, when it will be launched or, yes, what position will she be assuming, she will says this much: "I will prove to all those inggiteras that I am more than what they think I am."

Whatever that is, before or behind the cameras, she'll be in a knockout outfit for sure, and will be knocking 'em dead with her presence. Asked why she thinks people continue to talk about her despite her absence from the limelight, she pauses, and then, bright-eyed and smiling. "Because I'm amazing.- -